Purity DVD by Jim Berg - one of the best resources for Men

Jim Berg has come out with a men's conference DVD on the topic of Purity for men. This link purtiy to leadership and shows why a man who struggles with purity will also struggle leading. Every guy who wishes to be married will need to lead some day - at the very least their wife and probably their children as well. This topic most downplayed and ignored by the Church today is well addressed by this DVD series. The title of the eight sections are:

Session 1Biblical Morality

Session 2 Biblical Morality, Part 2

Session 3 Why Sex Didn’t Satisfy Solomon, Part 1

Session 4 Why Sex Didn’t Satisfy Solomon, Part 2

Session 5 he Anatomy of Lust, Part 1

Session 6 The Anatomy of Lust, Part 2

Session 7 Preventative Strategies (Staying Out of a Skid)

Session 8 Rescue Strategies (Getting Out of a Skid)

The DVD also includes a PDF of a syllabus which is about 80 pages worth of good advice for men.

You can find this DVD series at http://www.bjupress.com/product/256248

The following is an extract from the syllabus:

How can we safeguard our families in a culture that constantly streams immorality to us throughmovies, music, and immodest dress? How can we teach modesty and purity to our children?How can we overcome the pull of pornography and immorality ourselves? How can we becomemen of moral courage who win the respect of our families and have an impact upon a corruptworld? How can we understand and minister to the homosexual and to the sexually addicted?These are questions for us to consider in these sessions together.

Though this seminar is not rated PG-13, it is strongly recommended that a father give some“parental guidance” in these areas as is appropriate for his son’s maturity level beginning in hisearly teen years. These principles should equip father and son to have some serious discussions regarding purity and godliness.

How can I know God's will for my life?

So you want to know what God wants in your life? What should I do for God?

Wrong question... go to this post to find out the right question you should be asking.

How do I know God's will?

In the book "Experiencing God", the author talks about when you ask the wrong questions, you will always get the wrong answers. One question we often ask wrongly is "How do I know God's will for my life". The author explains that this is a wrong question because we make ourselves the centre of everything when in fact it is God who is and should be at the centre of everything. The right question is

How do I know God's will? When you know His will, its up to you to put yourself in the middle of God's will by obeying what you know. The Bible mentions in many places "the will of God" (and funnily enough, all of these are in the New Testament).

Not conformed to the world Romans 12:2 And be not conformed to this world: but be ye transformed by the renewing of your mind, that ye may prove what is that good, and acceptable, and perfect, will of God.

From your heart Ephesians 6:6 Not with eyeservice, as menpleasers; but as the servants of Christ, doing the will of God from the heart;

Be sanctified (constantly check and confess for your sins)
1 Thessalonians 4:3 For this is the will of God, even your sanctification, that ye should abstain from fornication:

Give Thanks for Everything 1 Thessalonians 5:18 In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.

Do the right thing 1 Peter 2:15 For so is the will of God, that with well doing ye may put to silence the ignorance of foolish men:

Share the Gospel to the lost world 2 Peter 3:9 The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.

... and you will abide forever
1 John 2:17 And the world passeth away, and the lust thereof: but he that doeth the will of God abideth for ever.

How do you discover God's will for your life then? Obey Him. Find opportunities in your life to obey him. Consider what God wants you to do. Read the Bible and do it. If in doubt, wait. Does God give guidance? Yes but you must obey Him first. Gideon only sought a sign from God while he was already in the process of doing God's will ... not to decide WHETHER to do God's will.

Listen to this message for more on God's will:


or one of my personal favourites:

Top 10 Christian messages of All Time

If you are looking for some "must listen to" messages, have a look at the following from SermonAudio.com. These are the top downloaded messages. If you found any of these messages particularly useful, leave a comment for the benefit of other visitors. 

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OK one more... 11.

They that worship Him must worship Him in Spirit and in Truth

Do you find it hard to worship? The problem probably lies with your lack of interaction/intimacy with God. When you are close to God and you realise the reality of how sinful you are, your reaction to God's mercy and love towards you would be to worship Him. Worship is like a reaction to God's goodness. It comes naturally to a truly converted believer. The inability to worship reflects a possible problem in (or absence of) a relationship with God and is a good indication that things need to change between you and God.

There is a website which looks at Hymns and their stories behind how they were written and composed. Knowing this can help you to appreciate the words in the hymn and worship more meaningfully. Go to this page to get studies on Hymns. A sample is found below:

"JESUS PAID IT ALL"
"Purge me...and I shall be clean; wash me, and I shall be whiter than show" (Psa. 51.7)

INTRO.: A hymn which encourages us to remember that Jesus made it possible for us to be purged, cleansed, and washed whiter than snow is "Jesus Paid It All" (#488 in Hymns for Worship Revised and #606 in Sacred Selections for the Church). The text was written by Elvina Mabel Hall, who was born at Alexandria, VA, on June 4, 1820, the daughter of Capt. David Reynolds. After she married Richard Hall, for forty years they were faithful members of the Monument St. Methodist Church in Baltimore, MD. One Sunday morning in 1865, while supposedly listening to the minister's rather lengthy closing prayer, her mind wandered and she began thinking about the lesson's message regarding God's forgiveness and all that Christ had done to provide redemption for mankind, especially for her. A poem began forming in her mind, so since she had no paper handy she looked around and spied the only thing at hand to write on, a hymnbook whose title was the New Lute of Zion.

Picking up the hymnbook and opening to a blank flyleaf, Elvina began jotting down the verses. After the service, she showed it to the minister, George W. Schrick, although she was somewhat embarrassed at having to explain that she had written it in a hymnbook during the prayer. Schrick tucked it away in his files. Sometime after receiving Mrs. Hall's words, Mr. Schrick called on the church's music director, John Thomas Grape (1835-1915). Mr. Grape, also a successful coal merchant in Baltimore and an amateur musician, had earlier been impressed with another hymn entitled "Jesus Paid It All" which had appeared in The Golden Censer, a hymnbook published in 1864 by William B. Bradbury. Grape had composed a tune (All to Christ) patterned after the other hymn. When he gave a copy to Schrick, they found that the stanzas written by Mrs. Hall fit it perfectly. The song was soon sung at several churches in the Baltimore area.

Three years later, in 1868, someone--either Schrick or Grape--sent the hymn to be published in the 1868 collection, Sabbath Chords, compiled by Theodore Perkins for Brown and Perkins in New York City, NY. It is possible that Mrs. Hall was also familiar with the Bradbury song and was unconsciously influenced by it when she produced her words. Many alterations have been made to her original text, and this accounts for the changes of wording in different books. The song in its present form appeared in the 1874 Gospel Song Book Collection published by Philip Paul Bliss (1838-1876). After the death of her first husband, Elvina married Thomas Myers in 1885. He was a Methodist minister with the Baltimore Conference. She died three years later at Ocean Grove, NJ, on July 18, 1889.

Among hymnbooks published by members of the Lord's church during the twentieth century for use in churches of Christ, the song appeared in the 1921 Great Songs of the Church (No. 1) and the 1937 Great Songs of the Church No. 2 both edited by E. L. Jorgenson; the 1935 Christian Hymns (No. 1), the 1948 Christian Hymns No. 2, and the 1966 Christian Hymns No. 3 all edited by L. O. Sanderson; the 1963 Abiding Hymns edited by Robert C. Welch; and the 1963 Christian Hymnal edited by J. Nelson Slater. Today it may be found in the 1971 Songs of the Church, the 1990 Songs of the Church 21st C. Ed., and the 1994 Songs of Faith and Praise all edited by Alton H. Howard; the 1983 Church Gospel Songs and Hymns edited by V. E. Howard; and the 1992 Praise for the Lord edited by John P. Wiegand; in addition to Hymns for Worship, Sacred Selections, and the 2007 Sacred Songs of the Church edited by William D. Jeffcoat.

The hymn reminds us of the price that Jesus paid to save us from our sins.

I. From stanza 1 we learn that Jesus alone must be our all in all
"I hear the Savior say, 'Thy strength indeed is small;
Child of weakness, watch and pray, Find in Me thine all in all."
A. Our strength indeed is small because we all have sinned: Rom. 3.23
B. As a result, we are children of weakness before God and cannot save ourselves by our own good works: Eph. 2.8-9, Tit. 3.5
C. The reason that Jesus is our all in all is that only in Him is found redemption: Col. 1.12-14

II. From stanza 2 we learn that nothing but His power can change us
"Lord, now indeed I find Thy power and Thine alone
Can change the leper's spots, And melt the heart of stone."
A. Of course, the power of Jesus Christ to make this change is in the gospel: Rom. 1.16
B. By that same divine power Christ changed the leper's spots: Matt. 8.1-4
C. And this power can melt the heart of stone to change those who are unrighteous to those who are justified before God: 1 Cor. 6.9-11

III. From stanza 3 we learn that it is Christ's blood that can wash away our sin
"For nothing good have I Whereby Thy grace to claim;
I'll wash my garments white In the blood of Calvary's Lamb."
A. Nothing that we can do, no good works of ourselves, can make us clean: Tit. 3.3-5
B. Only the grace and power of God can take our sins which are like scarlet and make them white as snow: Isa. 1.18
C. The means by which He is able to do this is the blood of Christ: 1 Jn. 1.7

IV. From stanza 4 we learn that the righteousness which Christ proves us brings blessings
"And now complete in Him, With robes of righteousness,
Close sheltered 'neath His side, I am divinely blessed."
A. We can be complete in Christ because He has done everything that is needed to make salvation available: Col. 2.10
B. Thus, it is by the righteousness of Christ in dying for us that we are redeemed: Rom. 3.24-26
C. All spiritual blessings in heavenly places are found in Him and Him alone: Eph. 1.3-7

V. From stanza 5 we learn that His death will enable us to stand before His throne
"And when before the throne I stand in Him complete,
I'll lay my tropies down, All down at Jesus' feet."
A. Someday we shall stand before His throne in judgment: Matt. 25.31-33ff, Rom. 14.12, 2 Cor. 5.10
B. However, those who have obeyed the Lord's will so as to serve and please Him will stand before Him complete and hear Him say, "Well done": Matt. 25.21
C. They will lay their trophies down at His feet and be granted eternal salvation: Heb. 5.8-9 (note: some songbooks have altered the final two lines of the stanza to read, "'Jesus died my soul to save,' My lips shall still repeat")

CONCL.: The chorus joyfully proclaims the fact that Jesus is the basis for our salvation.
"Jesus paid it all, All to Him I owe;
Sin had left a crimson stain, He washed it white as snow."
It should be a great source of encouragement to us in trying to deal with the problem of sin in our lives to know that forgiveness is available because "Jesus Paid It All."

Taken from http://www.homeschoolblogger.com/hymnstudies

How to be Humble

CJ Mahaney, former pastor of Covenant Life Church in the USA has this list of ways to cultivate humility. This list is taken from ChristianCounseling.wordpress.com

Each day you should be addressing your greatest enemy and cultivating your greatest friend. So here’s how I attempt to mortify pride and cultivate humility.

1. Study the attributes of God, especially His incommunicable attributes
2. Reflect on the wonder of the Cross of Christ
3. Study the Doctrines of Grace
4. Study the Doctrine of Sin
5. Cultivate spiritual disciplines
6. Invite and pursue correction
7. Encourage and serve others each and every day
8. Identify evidences of grace in others
9. Respond humbly to trials
10. Discern your thorns
11. Use unflattering illustrations of yourself publicly
12. Recognize your theological limitations
13. Prepare to be replaced
14. Recognize your relative unimportance
15. Laugh with others when you are the object of humor
16. Play golf as much as possible…
17. Read as many of C.H. Spurgeon’s sermons as possible

Also, start reading books such as the freely available book by Andrew Murray called "Humility"
here.

If I don't want to obey God am I a hypocrite if I obey

When you take off your rose-tinted glasses and look at your Christian life, you realise that you are not ALWAYS obeying God happily or willingly. Sometimes/often you don't want to obey. One of the common lies we tell ourselves is that if we obey God when we don't feel like it, we are being a hypocrite. When you're told to take out the trash, do you refuse to do it because you don't feel like it and doing so will make you a hypocrite?

Obeying when we don't feel like it is not hypocrisy. Jesus wants us to take up our cross and follow him but if it was not a burden, what is the point of Jesus telling us to take up our cross? if it cost us nothing or if we would do it anyway, what's the point of telling us to do it. There are times that we won't feel like obeying but when we choose to obey ANYWAY, we are saying "nevertheless I live, yet not I, but Christ liveth in me." An example given before is - are you a hypocrite for getting out of bed in the morning when you dont feel like it? You're only a hypocrite if you don't get out of bed and pass comment on those that don't get out of bed.

Philippians 2:13 For it is God which worketh in you both to will and to do of his good pleasure.

If you lack the willingness.. do the right thing anyway but ask God for the willingness because it is the WILL and the DO of His good pleasure that comes from God. But you have to take a first step and leave the journey to God. Trust and obey ==> Grace?

How do you Know God's Will? Grace from God

There is something about grace which we forget. Grace is divine enablement to do what we should be doing. This implies obedience. One thing we often forget is that grace only powers you while you are obeying. The decision to seek God or obey him is for you to make first. The power to carry that decision is given by God.

So when seeking God's will on something, you need to get the ball rolling even if it means picking up the ball. Every step, seek God's confirmation that He is wanting you to be doing this (I guess this is where signs can come in?) How far that ball rolls could probably help you determine whether it is God's will. (This all presumes that you can clearly see that what you are doing is in obedience to Him). WOuld God show you a sign that you are walking in the right direction when you are seeking to obey him? Think about it. Why wouldnt He? He delights in our obedience. God created the world and what is all that power going to be used for if not for encouraging his people to obey Him? So His divine enablement is correlated to the level of conformity your decision has to God's priorities.

So another connection drawn. God's grace, His divine enablement, is how God shows us His will. If Grace is the superpower to do what God wants you to do, then seeking God's will is finding out what God wants you to do. When you have power to do it, grace is helping you find God's will.. think that makes sense..

No God's Grace leads to Bitterness

Bitterness has an element of frustration with yourself. It could be letting yourself into a situation which you wish you hadn't entered or it could be with your inability to deal with a current situation. In the tragic story of King David's son raping his sister, strange thing happens with Amnon who ends up hating the sister he lusted after. Why? Bitterness?

2 Samuel 13:15 Then Amnon hated her exceedingly; so that the hatred wherewith he hated her was greater than the love wherewith he had loved her. And Amnon said unto her, Arise, be gone.

In a sense, he hated himself for getting himself into that situation and hated her for letting it happen. This doesn't happen when we obey God because His assurance that we are on the right track helps us deal with the unpleasant things that obedience brings about. However, when you want to hack through life on your own, in disobedience to God, you will end up hating yourself and feeling bitter with others.

God's grace is the supernatural ability to do what God wants you to do and to be what we ought to be. Without it, we can be bitter people. Situations and people can overwhelm us. However, when God is giving us grace, it is always sufficient to deal with ALL situations.

2 Corinthians 12:9 And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

Its the supernatural counter balance that helps you get through the trial, temptation or area of service. When you have grace from God, it is evident. You are overflowing with God's provision such that you don't lack anything.

Psalms 23:1 The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want.

When we have grace, we can't be bitter because with grace, we are contented. When we are contented, we don't become bitter. No one is able to deprive us when our supply comes from God. Whatever people do, we are stable when we drink from the God's living stream.

Don't want to be bitter? Get grace from God. How do you get grace? see this post. If anything doesn't sound right here, feel free to comment.

I'm Lonely. Does anyone care? God Understands - Psalm 139

We are never alone. God knows and undestands us intimately. God cares for us and uses the Psalms to show that he understands this feeling of loneliness.

Lonely Lies: Nobody notices me
Psalms 139:1 <> O LORD, thou hast searched me, and known me.

(LORD in capitals means the personal name of God. He knows everything about us and when we are alone and sad, He is there. He takes personal interest in your life and loves you. Friends may fail us but God will always be there. He knows all our sins and died to save us. How much more will he embrace his child when they are lonely?)

2 Thou knowest my downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought afar off.

3 Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art acquainted with all my ways.

(We are never outside his presence. He surrounds us. We can't escape God's love for us)

4 For there is not a word in my tongue, but, lo, O LORD, thou knowest it altogether.

(He knows everything you did. He knows the secret thoughtst that we would be embarrassed to admit to anyone else. Even so he still loves you)

Lonely Lies: I want to be alone
5 Thou hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me.

(When God sees us in need. He takes initiative to lay his hand on us. To comfort us if we want it).

6 Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot attain unto it.

Lonely Lies: Nobody wants me around
7 Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or whither shall I flee from thy presence?

8 If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed in hell, behold, thou art there.

9 If I take the wings of the morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea;

10 Even there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold me.

11 If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me; even the night shall be light about me.

12 Yea, the darkness hideth not from thee; but the night shineth as the day: the darkness and the light are both alike to thee.

(Our natural reaction when we are depressed and sad is to push others away. We don't want others around us because no one understands. However, we can never leave God's presence. God knows that while you are running, you actually want comfort. When others give up on making you feel better, God continues to stand next to us to comfort us.)

Lonely Lies: I'm just a cosmic accident or part of evolution, not created by a loving God
13 For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my mother's womb.

14 I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul knoweth right well.

15 My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the earth.

16 Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in thy book all my members were written, which in continuance were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them.

17 How precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is the sum of them!

18 If I should count them, they are more in number than the sand: when I awake, I am still with thee.

(When we say "who cares about me?" The answer is, God cares about us. He formed us meticulously and carefully and even bothered to make sure your DNA is unique to everyone else just to show you that he knows you specifically. It is a comfort to know not just SOMEONE cares but a God who created everything and us, cares.)

Lonely Lies: God doesn't care about the forsaken, downcast and lonely.
19 Surely thou wilt slay the wicked, O God: depart from me therefore, ye bloody men.

20 For they speak against thee wickedly, and thine enemies take thy name in vain.

21 Do not I hate them, O LORD, that hate thee? and am not I grieved with those that rise up against thee?

22 I hate them with perfect hatred: I count them mine enemies.

23 Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my thoughts:

24 And see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.

(God is the great avenger and empathises with people who are cast down, wronged or abused. God will judge. But he is also merciful so come just as you are to your loving God. The God who was betrayed by his disciple, he knows how it feels to be alone).

How to check your attitude about anything

Sometimes, it is hard for us to identify sin in our life because we don't think that we have a tendency towards any particular sin. One way to test whether we are drawn by a certain sin or maybe even a person, is to ask these three questions. From this you can tell what your attitude is towards the person or thing.

1. What do you say about _____ (person/place/thing)___?
2. Do you move toward or away from ______?
3. Do you seek out ways to come into more contact with _____?

Remember that once you realise you have a tendency to sin, God is always willing to forgive you because Jesus Christ has paid for your sins and you can be made clean by receiving his sacrifice on the cross that was intended for you. For more information, go to www.needgod.com

How to "be a man" and "do the right thing"

Also how to be a woman. Here are a few messages recommended by CBMW.org (Council for Biblical Manhood and Womanhood)

Item Title	Author
19 Objections to Complementarianism	J. Ligon Duncan III
Affirming the Goodness of Manhood and Womanhood in All of Life	John Piper
Biblical Manhood and Womanhood: The Big Picture	J. Ligon Duncan III
Christ's Example (1 Corinthians 11:2-16)	J. Ligon Duncan III
God's High Calling for Women Part 1	John MacArthur
God's High Calling for Women Part 2	John MacArthur
God's Pattern for Husbands Part 1	John MacArthur
God's Pattern for Husbands Part 2	John MacArthur
God's Pattern for Wives Part 1	John MacArthur
God's Pattern for Wives Part 2	John MacArthur
How These Biblical Definitions of Manhood and Womanhood Apply in the Home and the Church	J. Ligon Duncan III
Husbands Who Love Like Christ and the Wives Who Submit to Them	John Piper
Jesus, Women, and Men	John Piper
Male and Female He Created Them in the Image of God	John Piper
Male Authority and Female Equality in Light of Galatians 3:28	J. Ligon Duncan III
Male Authority and Female Equality: In the beginning (Genesis 1-3)	J. Ligon Duncan III
Manhood and Womanhood Before Sin	John Piper
Manhood and Womanhood Conflict and Confusion After the Fall	John Piper
Manhood, Womanhood and the Freedom to Minister	John Piper
Modern Stumbling Blocks to Gender Roles	J. Ligon Duncan III
Silent in the Church: Why Can’t Women Preach?	J. Ligon Duncan III
The "S"ubmission Word	J. Ligon Duncan III
The Character of a Healthy Church Part 2	John MacArthur
The Character of a Healthy Church Part 3	John MacArthur
The Character of a Healthy Church Part 4	John MacArthur
The Gender Neutral Bible Controversy	J. Ligon Duncan III
Women in the Church and Silence in the Church	J. Ligon Duncan III

Must listen to this:

What to use to follow up new believers

After years of evangelism and follow up experience, I find that NavPress has the best material for new believers. The booklet is now called Lessons on Assurance but you can also find it as part of a bigger bible study booklet called Growing in Christ.

The material is easy to use and covers 5 main areas the devil casts doubt in a new believers life.

1. assurance of salvation
2. assurance of answered prayer
3. assurance of victory over sin
4. assurance of forgiveness
5. assurance of guidance

Why many bloggers blogs fail

All over the internet, there are half-finished blogs that have their first and last post somewhere in 2006. You normally come across these blogs when you think of a great name for your blog ... then realise someone has taken it already!!

Here are three reasons why many people fail to maintain a blog:

1. They didn't have a reason to keep a blog in the first place. Sounds relatively obvious but quite often people sign up for a blog without any purpose for the blog. For this blog, the purpose is to give ideas and encourage people to know how to live for Christ better. Some blogs are just a mind-dump of ideas and thoughts which after a while, people realise the futility of it all.

2. There is no intended target reader. For GodHacks, the target readers are Christians and those that want to know how to live better lives in the Christian way. For some blogs, as mentioned before, it was just a mind-dump and they are starting to realise people are not that interested in what they are thinking. In fact, quite often it is probably not a good thing to let everyone know what you think, let alone the whole world!

3. The struggle to maintain a blog. Some blogs fail because people just can't be bothered. I personally find that a lot of blogs run by Christians continue to run because a Christian's motivation to blog in the first place was more long term than others. Many Christians want to impact the world in a bigger way and embark on a blog to do so. This is a strong motivation if you continue to walk with God consistently.

There are heaps more reasons but these are some. Perhaps you have one or two reasons you have thought of why blogs fail.

Is www.GoMessenger.net a scam?

I received an email claiming to be from a friend on my msn contact but I am not sure whether it is a scam. If you have tried this website out and you did discover someone has blocked you - could you please reply to this via the comments section? I have a feeling that it is a scam but one to pick up your msn contacts, not one which steals your password or anything.

 

So, is gomessenger.net a scam?   

Does God REALLY care if Christians date or marry non Christians?

FOrget what your pastor, friend, parent or teacher says for a moment and let God speak on his own behalf through His own words (using King James version because its the closest to the original):

2 Corinthians 6

14 Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and what communion hath light with darkness?
15 And what concord hath Christ with Belial? or what part hath he that believeth with an infidel?
16 And what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.
17 Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,
18 And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.

So, how many ways did God say we should not be unequally yoked with unbelievers?

(1) Be ye not unequally yoked together with unbelievers: (2) for what fellowship hath righteousness with unrighteousness? and (3) what communion hath light with darkness? And (4) what concord hath Christ with Belial? or (5) what part hath he that believeth with an infidel? And (6) what agreement hath the temple of God with idols? (7) for ye are the temple of the living God; as God hath said, I will dwell in them, and walk in them; and I will be their God, and they shall be my people.

Wherefore come out from among them, and be ye separate, saith the Lord, and touch not the unclean thing; and I will receive you,18 And will be a Father unto you, and ye shall be my sons and daughters, saith the Lord Almighty.

Interpret it whatever way you want but it seems clear what God was saying. If we are not to marry non Christians, then we should not start relationships with them.

This sounds so limiting If you believe God created the world in six days, you can be sure He will find you a life partner that suits you, which does not have to contradict His own instructions (repeated seven times in seven different ways in case you missed the point).

That's mean to unbelievers What is meaner is that if we presume you are Christian, you must believe that we are sinners, deserving of Hell but only through Jesus Christ dying on the cross for us we can be saved. If we presume that is what you believe, what is meaner is when you don't seek as your first priority as bringing your girlfriend or boyfriend to salvation first. They are heading to hell and all you care about is your feelings for her?

If you want to proceed with marriage with a non Christian, be prepared to have Satan as your father in law.

3 Essential Lessons on Marriage

Three FREE essential lessons on marriage that every person intending to get married should hear (comments from sermonaudio.com listeners added in)

Choosing to Love - Dr Greg Mazak (Bob Jones University)
Thank you for the great message! I never knew this! For long, i've wondered what is truely necessary before marriage I'd like to share this great truth with my friends


Destroying Pop Christian Views of Marital Bliss (for the guys) - Paul Washer
I'm not married, or in a "relationship," but this sermon was awesome and gave me a whole new paradigm for marriage. I was one of the "get married and go minister together" kind of mentality. But I realize now there is so much more depth... Praise God for this message.



Destroying Pop Christian Views of Marital Bliss 2 (for the ladies) - Paul Washer
I have listened to A LOT of sermons on marriage but none better than this. I was convicted to the core that what was preached is the truth we all need to hear.



Know any more?

How to succeed in building a happy marriage

Lessons learnt in Pre-Marital Counseling training

There is no such thing as compatibility and falling in love.

Love is NOT just

• a feeling (lust is)
• "something that happened"

Love is

• a choice
• giving, not getting
• preferring the other person over your own personal interests (now can you see why marriages fail?)

Two Christians are ready to get married only when they have demonstrated adequately in scenarios posed to them that they are willing to and able to solve problems by thinking through things through God's word. The Bible is very practical and meant to be used to solve ALL of life's problems.

Everyone is different in the way they think. Two people getting married are not meant to think the same. That is why books like Men from Mars and Women from Venus are so popular because they express God's plan - to make men and women completely different so that together they can solve family problems from two perspectives and be able to approach problems more comprehensively.

Its more important that a couple think together than they think alike. If they learn to process problems together, that will set them up for marriage and if they know how to appreciate the different points of view that they come from, they can be an example to others of God's way marriage was intended to be - successful and long lasting marriage.

Lifehack - Why you should get Pre-Marital (Marriage) Counseling

Pre-marital Counseling Why is it so important? If 50-75% of the cars manufactured by Toyota blew up in the early part of their expected life, everyone would be shocked! Problem is, marriages are not given the same level of attention as manufacture of cars – even though marriage break downs can have an equally devastating effect. If you are going to get married, you should go for the most extensive counseling you can get.

Why else:

1. It’s the second most important decision in a person’s life (other than receiving God’s forgiveness and ensuring that we are going to heaven)
2. God treats marriage very seriously, we should too
3. The Church is made up of families
4. The more time the Church spends on pre-marital counseling, the less it spends on divorce, family problems, marriage counseling and other related problems
5. You spend much of your formative years in a family and it dictates what person you become
6. It’s easier to change a relationship at the beginning than in the middle of a relationship
7. It’s easier to do marriage when the guidelines are set at the beginning

Where to get Pre-Marriage Counseling? From the Church. Marriage came from the Bible. God instituted Adam and Eve to be married so if you ARE going to get married, do it God’s way. Some Churches have a very slack marriage counseling program. If yours does, find another one. It’s worth it.

What kind of Pre-Marriage Counseling? Since every individual is created differently, it is better to learn from the author of mankind (God) than to learn from someone else’s experience. Some people will only teach you based on their experiences, don’t learn from them if that is all they offer! God has a vested interest in making marriages work (because he uses marriage as an example of his relationship to the Church) so he also has very clear and defined instructions on marriage.

Bob Jones University has a Pre-Marital counselling series on video which Churches or individuals can purchase or borrow for a semester. This series is excellent as it is based on Biblical principles not people’s experiences.

Unit Five: Premarital Counseling

Overview of the premarital counseling process
God's goals for marriage
Essential habits of Christian character
Biblical roles in marriage
Biblical communication and problem solving
Finances, sex, & in-laws

Follow this link for more details http://www.bjupress.com/services/ibe/courses/special_topics/biblical_counseling_series.htm

Recommended Reading

Ministry of Marriage - Jim Binney
Preparing for Marriage God's Way - Wayne Mack

Evangelism is NOT an obligation its a PRIVILEGE

When you see anything as an obligation or just as a commandment, you will not be able to do it long. In the long term, that motivation will not last. If you want to do something for God, such as evangelism, prayer, reading the Bible you have to make yourself see that these are privileges that are open to Christians. You don't need to command someone to support a basketball team that they love. You don't command your husband to love you. These things are best done when we realise how privileged we are to have these available to us.

With Evangelism you are sharing the joy of salvation with people who are already condemned! You are providing a cure for a disease that will bring them eternal punishment. You are helping show a man on death row that he can receive a pardon from the judge. If you can see your friend, neighbour, stranger or colleague standing at the pit of hell in great despair, your prayer for them and your fervency in evangelism will increase. But always remember that they are not good people in trouble with a bad God. They are bad people in trouble with a good, Holy, Just and Loving God. If you get this wrong, their conversion will be spurious.

How to get over hating yourself

As news reports indicate, mistreatment of children is tragically common. And kids wounded by abuse can be scarred for life. Fortunately, most people's experiences aren't that extreme. But even mild hurts can fester, affecting relationships and self-image.

The Origin. The bondage of self-rejection can often be traced to feeling unaccepted by someone close. Trauma like divorce or a loved one's death may also contribute to a distorted self-image. Once internalized, this type of thought pattern can lead to negative behaviors.

The Symptoms. If a person has trouble accepting himself, he may have a tendency to criticize others and interpret innocent comments as personal attacks. Perfectionism and feelings of inferiority are also common. As a result, fear of failure and criticism may lead to procrastination.

Unpredictable anger is another outcome of self-rejection. With people who are hurt, frustration may ignite easily. Such individuals might become loners or feel overly concerned about others' opinions. For example, instead of concentrating on a church service, one may notice what people are wearing and feel insecure about her own outfit. Someone with this mindset can be hard to love because she questions whether she's worthy of care and affection. Sadly, she may then behave in a way that "proves" her theory.

The solution is found in today's scripture: Believers are to accept one another as Jesus accepts them. This includes accepting themselves. Ask God to search your heart and reveal any areas of self-rejection.

READ | Romans 15:7

This article comes from http://ww2.intouch.org/site/lookup.asp?c=dhKHIXPKIuE&b=2316001

What to do if I like a guy (part 2)

The following is taken from GirlTalk.blogs.com about what a single girl is to do if she is interested in a guy.

1. God has created us as women to be responsive to men’s leadership. This is clear throughout Scripture, not only in the created order and our calling to be helpers (Gen. 2:18-23), but in the commands for a wife to submit to her husband (Eph. 5:22-23) . If we seek to take matters into our own hands and “do something” about a situation such as this, we are depriving a man of an opportunity to fulfill his God-given calling to lead. Truly believing in the importance and significance of our femininity means living it out, even in the pressure cooker of strong desires. We must resist the temptation to allow our feelings and desires and not God’s Word dictate our direction. On a purely personal note, my mom used to ask me: Don’t you ultimately want a guy who is attracted enough to pursue you, without needing hints from you?

2. God is sovereign, loving, and wise. “But this guy I like hasn't pursued me. How do I resolve the fear that he won't notice me unless I take some initiative?” You may ask. Enter: the character of God. Human reasoning would say that this is incentive enough to buck the created order. However, we must hold fast to God’s Word and trust in His character. God is intimately involved in every detail of our lives (down to the hairs on our head). We must trust that His sovereignty is more than powerful enough, His love is more than true enough, and His wisdom more than knowledgeable enough to fulfill His perfect plan for us. This perfect plan may or may not include the desired relationship. But it will most definitely be for our good. As a single woman, Psalm 84:10-12 was my hope: “For a day in your courts is better
 than a thousand elsewhere. 
I would rather be a doorkeeper in the house of my God 
than dwell in the tents of wickedness.
 For the Lord God is a sun and shield; 
the Lord bestows favor and honor.
No good thing does he withhold
 from those who walk uprightly.
O Lord of hosts,
blessed is the one who trusts in you!”

3. God rewards our trust in Him. We don’t say “no” to our feelings and “yes” to God’s Word without a fight. And yet, there is joy and peace and freedom to be had. Psalm 131’s description of the weaned child, not concerned with things too lofty or wonderful, comes to mind. So does 1 Peter 3 and the woman whose beauty is of great worth in the sight of God because she does not “fear anything that is frightening.” Waiting and responding instead of initiating romantic relationships is not some kind of manipulative trick. It is the path to true attractiveness, the miraculous kind that only comes by the grace of God producing trust in God. For truly blessed is the woman who does not sinfully strive after a relationship, but quietly rests in the goodness of God!

Does he like me? What should I do?

When you think that a guy is interested in you, but the guy has not explicitly said anything to you, there is a danger that you could have already begun "dating in your mind". This will lead you to be bitter and discontented and stray away from God. From Crosswalk.com, here are a few danger signs to look out for:

• Do I talk about him a lot to other people?
• If these other people don’t share my enthusiasm, and even caution me to not cultivate expectations, do I feel deflated and resent their input?
• Am I going to this event or meeting primarily because he will be there?
• Am I distracted in church or small-group meetings because of his presence?
• Do I break other commitments because he’s invited me to do something spontaneously?
• If he doesn’t talk to me or single me out at events, do I go home disappointed?
• Am I jealous of the women he does talk to or serve?
• If he declines one of my invitations, am I tempted to feel rejected?
• When he does pay attention to me, am I so oriented to him in a group setting that I don’t consider the needs of others around me?

The author offers the following advice if you think he's interested in you.

• Prayer: Take your petitions to God, for He’s the only one who can change a man’s heart, and this brings His peace to guard our own hearts.
• Pursuit: It’s not our job as women. Instead, we should have the joy of being pursued.
• Prevent Disappointment: Check yourself before you head down the slippery slope of desires, demands and expectations that Paul Tripp outlined. When you find your fist closing over good desires and making them demands, stop. Open that clenched fist and hold that desire up in prayer (see point one again).

But seriously, does this work? Read some true stories and get other good advice from the sisters at http://girltalk.blogs.com/girltalk/courtship/

Free Christian software for your phone/pc/pda

Use your palm or PC or even your phone to memorise verses / scripture. http://www.middlecross.com/lamplight.html

 

Or look up a word you can remember is part of a verse which you cant find. Find them all here at http://freechristiansoftware.org/palm.htm 

 

We've talked about carrying your Bible in your phone. Download the JAVA or SYMBIAN 60 v2 versions at www.go-bible.org

Read the Bible in a year

Christians’ most popular new year’s resolution is probably to read the Bible in a year. Here are some tips how you could achieve this:

Get some friends who are willing to do this too. You can encourage one another and remind each other using SMS and email to read the Bible. This can be done creatively. You could ask each other questions about the relevant passage and what they thought of it. Slowly those that are behind will quietly catch up and then maybe answer your questions

Use a communal blog such as www.bibleinayr.blogspot.com where people can share what they have learnt. When people read of what others have learnt, they will also be encouraged to get on track if they have fallen behind.

Get together to read your daily readings maybe once a month or something as an encouragement to one another.

Listen to the Bible in a year. Download your preferred version (if in doubt use King James) at www.audiotreasure.com

Pray and ask God to help you. Anyway, it IS His will for you to read His word so He will give you the supernatural power to do it J

Be consistent we forget things when we are not consistent in our approach. Therefore you should make it a daily habit to read the Bible possibly before something that you always do (such as breakfast).

Reduce distractions around you during the time that you are reading. The best way to do this is to get up early. After a few struggles waking up at the same time every day will be easier and easier. It was how our body was supposed to function anyway.

Follow a good program of Bible reading such as the plan by Our Daily Bread http://www.rbc.org/odb/odb.shtml which has the daily reading on the bottom of your page. It has you reading Old Testament during the weekdays with a few proverbs, New Testament on Saturday and Psalms on Sunday. This is a good variety.

Set an alarm to remind you every day of your commitment.

Got more tips?